I SAW AN ANGEL (UPDATED)

I once saw an angel.

It was in the shape of a snow white owl.

It was late at night

and I was walking my dog,

knowing I needed to change my life,

make some very hard

decisions.

The owl spread its wings,

heading right for me,

white as snow,

looking straight into my eyes.

Wings wider than the sidewalk,

stronger than a tree,

flying right towards my dog and me.

I was a little frightened
but just for a second.
 For an instant,

I was jolted out 

of my self.

Very suddenly

it dawned on me
I knew it was not an owl,
but an angel.

The angel landed right in front of me,

looked straight into my eyes
for a minute or two,

then flew away,
and all the time my dog just sat there,
not running after it or barking at it
as dogs are want to do.

Goose bumps ran down my arms,

shivers tingled down my spine,

peace touched my heart and sang into my soul.

 I was not alone.

This sight was confirmation

that I was making the right decision,

cleansing my life,

making things right.

I only wish I would see this angel again.

White owls are not indigenous to Southern California.  Google it.
Also, when a white owl flew over an army headed towards battle, it was a sign of victory.  

THIS REALLY HAPPENED TO ME
WHEN I WAS LIVING IN SAN CLEMENTE, CA

Sing (UPDATED)

The bruises go away,

the scars fade,

and the longings change.

Today is a new chance

to live the life and to be the person that I want to be.

I want to give God glory,

to stay on the right path,

to love my family,

and to be loved for who I am.

I want to make a difference,

to shine my light in this dark world,

to show everyone that I am not the same,

to change my name.

I want Jesus to stay by my side,

to never leave or forsake me, 

to abide deep in my heart

and never part.

Yes, I want it all,

never to be petty or small,

to make a difference,

touch someone,

tell them it's okay

and that they are not alone.
I've been quiet for far too long,

So I am going to sing His song
and shout
before the rocks cry out,
sing of the love
that can only come from above.
Jesus is the answer,
Jesus is the key,
Jesus is the only one
for me.

PSALM 14:18 - MAY THESE WORDS OF MY MOUTH AND THE MEDITATION OF MY HEART BE PLEASING IN YOUR SIGHT, LORD, MY ROCK AND MY REDEEMER.

HIDE ME(UPDATED)

SEARCH MY HEART, LORD,
MAKE ME YOURS.

CHANGE MY MIND,
MAKE ME WHOLE.

GIVE ME HOPE,
BE MY PEACE.

I WANT
A NEW LEASE
ON THIS LIFE,
A REASON TO GET UP IN THE MORNING.

ARE THESE SIMPLE WORDS 
YOU GIVE ME
MAKING A DIFFERENCE?

DO I SHINE YOUR LIGHT?
HAVE I CARRIED ON?

DO I GIVE YOU GLORY?
AM I THE APPLE OF YOUR EYE?

IF I AM NOT ANY OF THESE THINGS,
THEN, PLEASE, JESUS,
CHANGE ME.
AND HIDE ME IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WINGS.


PSALM 17:18 -
KEEP ME AS THE APPLE OF YOUR EYE,
HIDE ME IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WINGS.

REALITY

Hide the wrinkles,

hide the flaws,

make it go away,

don't show your true self.

Tape it down,

don't frown.

Get rid of the weak chin,

the crooked nose

and please make me look thin.

What a shame to look real

or to be bigger than a size ten.

Hollywood is not reality.

TRUTH (UPDATED)

Does anyone really want to hear the truth?

Or do they just want to know secrets about you?

We all want to feel better about ourselves,

and knowing the worst of other's helps.

At least it does for me,

and I believe in honest honesty,

maybe too much for my own good,

and more than I should.

But that's most likely just the writer in me,

the artist bursting to become a celebrity,

to be accepted for who I am,

that doesn't want her life to be a sham.

I want my life to matter,

and I don't want to end up like my mother.

But isn't that the goal of all of us,

to be better than our betters,

to become unfettered?

Just look into my eyes and you will see

the truth that sets me free.

PSALM 4:3 - IN THE MORNING, O LORD, YOU HEAR MY VOICE; IN THE MORNING I LAY MY REQUESTS BEFORE YOU AND WAIT IN EXPECTATION.

REDEEMED (TRE' HARSH) (UPDATED)

YOU THROW HIS NAME AROUND

AS IF IT WERE A COMMON NOUN

AND USE HIS SON'S NAME AS A CURSE.

YET YOU TELL ME YOU DON'T BELIEVE

AND HAVE NEVER FALLEN TO YOUR KNEES

IN PRAYER AND SUPPLICATION.

ONLY AMBITION

IS ON YOUR MIND

AS IT WAS ON MINE AT ONE TIME.

BUT THEN I GAVE UP AND CAVED IN.

I COULDN'T DO THIS ON MY OWN.

I JUST WANTED TO GO HOME.

I WAS SICK OF THE RACE

AND I COULD NO LONGER KEEP UP THE PACE

SO I GAVE MY LIFE TO HIM.

HE WHO IS THE ONE AND ONLY,

THE GREAT I AM,

THE MASTER AND CREATOR

OF THIS WORLD IN WHICH I LIVE.

WE ARE NOT MEANT TO BE ALONE

OR TO CALL THIS WORLD OUR HOME

BECAUSE WE ONLY BELONG

TO GOD WHO IS ON HIS THRONE

HE MADE THIS PLACE WITH HIS BREATH,

DOWN TO THE DEEPEST DEPTH,

GOD KNOWS US BETTER THAN WE KNOW OURSELVES,

HOW MANY HAIRS ARE ON OUR HEAD.

HE KNIT US IN THE WOMB,

KNEW US FROM BEFORE THE BEGINNING.

HE EVEN KNOWS WHAT WILL COME.

THOUGH SOME SAY THEY CAN TELL,

ALTHOUGH THEY DON'T KNOW RIGHT FROM WRONG.

WE MUST ONLY LISTEN TO WHAT THE LORD SAYS.

WE SHOULDN'T EVEN LISTEN TO OURSELVES.

STAY IN HIS WORD,

AND STOP USING HIS NAME AS A CURSE.

AND KNOW THAT THE MIRROR

ONLY REFLECTS THROUGH A GLASS DARKLY,

DOESN'T SHOW OUR REAL SELVES,

NOT THE SOUL THAT LIES WITHIN,

NOR THE SIN IN OUR HEARTS,

ONLY THE PART THAT DOESN'T MATTER,

OUR SKIN, WHICH IS JUST A SHELL.

GIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE LORD.

STOP LIVING FOR YOURSELF.

THERE ARE SO MANY IN THIS WIDE WORLD

THAT HAVE NEVER KNOWN THE PEACE TO BE FOUND

IN SACRIFICING YOUR LIFE FOR HE WHO MADE IT ALL

AND GAVE HIS ONLY SON

TO DIE FOR US.

REDEEMED AND WASHED IN THE CRIMSON TIDE.

HEBREWS 11:1 - NOW FAITH IS BEING SURE OF WHAT WE HOPE FOR AND CONFIDENT OF WHAT WE DO NOT SEE.

ME, HONESTLY (HAVE A TISSUE HANDY)

THE DUST SETTLED INTO A CLOUD

AND SHE SLAMMED THE SCREEN DOOR.

DIRT FLEW EVERYWHERE,

BUT SHE DIDN'T CARE.

ALL SHE COULD SEE

WAS HER OWN AGONY.

WHY WAS SHE THIS WAY,

SO DIFFERENT,

SO INCONCEIVABLY GIANT?

HER SISTER WAS SMALL,

PETITE, NOT TALL AT ALL.

AND ALL THE SILLY NAMES THEY CALLED HER,

LIKE DADDY LONG LEGS,

YOU KNOW, THE SPIDER?

SHE WASN'T A SPIDER,

SHE WAS JUST HER,

A LITTLE GIRL WITH IMPOSSIBLY LONG LEGS AND BIG FEET,

AND THIS TALL AT ONLY THIRTEEN.

NO ONE ELSE IN THE ENTIRE FAMILY

WAS AS BIG AS SHE,

SO TALL SHE FELT SOMETIMES LIKE SHE WAS A TREE.

AND NO ONE WANTED TO PLAY WITH HER

BECAUSE SHE WAS SO DIFFERENT, SO TALL,

NOTHING LIKE HER SISTER OR MOTHER

WHO WERE BOTH SO SMALL.

HOW DID SHE EVER BECOME SO TALL?

ALL SHERRIE LYNN WANTED TO DO

WAS TO FIT IN.

AND THAT WAS PROBABLY NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.

SHE WONDERED IF ANYONE KNEW HOW FRUSTRATING IT WAS TO BE SO TALL
SHE FELT LIKE A GIANT ALL THE TIME,

LIKE A BIG TREE SWAYING IN THE BREEZE.

AND WHY WAS EVERYONE ALWAYS BLAMING HER

FOR EVERYTHING THAT WENT WRONG?

ALL OF THE SHOUTING, THE CRYING,

THE SCREAMING AND THE FIGHTING.

SHE JUST WANTED TO RUN AWAY

AND HIDE FOREVER AND EVER,

FOR ETERNITY.

JUST TO GET AWAY OR FIND SOME PEACE FOR A MINUTE EVERY DAY.

AND SHE REFUSED TO FIGHT.

FIGHTING NEVER GOT ANYONE ANYWHERE.

IT JUST MADE PEOPLE SAD AND LONELY AND MEAN AND ANGRY
WHEN THEY REALLY SHOULD BE SORRY.

AND GIANTS DIDN'T HAVE TO FIGHT,

SHE THOUGHT TO HERSELF, LAUGHING AT THE THOUGHT.

SHE WASN'T REALLY A GIANT,

JUST TALL AND DIFFERENT,

WITH BIG FEET AND LONG LEGS,

AND, SHE REALIZED,

JUST THE WAY

GOD HAD MADE HER.

GALATIANS 6:9 - LET US NOT GROW WEARY IN DOING GOOD, FOR AT THE PROPER TIME WE WILL REAP A HARVEST IF WE DO NOT GIVE UP.