Brokenness

Sadness is contagious,
brokenness sublime.
My spirit,
my heart,
my soul departed.
You hurt them all.
I try to communicate,
apologize for things I haven't done.
But do you reply?
Do you forgive?
What am I supposed to do
when you don't even make an effort?
Continue?
Jesus says to forgive 70 x 7.
That's not just a number,
it means forever.
So shall I forever forgive your non-reply?
What other option am I given
as a Christian?
Broken,
I shall forgive
and survive.

Prudency

Words hurt

and you can't take them back,

no matter the meaning

or the intent.

The harm is done,

the sword has been planted,

the heart is broken,

the soul is shattered.

Practice prudency

in what you say.

Hold your tongue

lest you hurt someone 

you love

unexpectedly.

Question

before you speak,

ask yourself

WWJD?

AM I GOOD ENOUGH?

I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING

AND IMMEDIATELY WONDER,

"AM I GOOD ENOUGH?"

HAVE I DONE ANYTHING

TO CHANGE THE CONDITION

OF THIS WORLD,

TOLD ANYONE ABOUT THE LORD?

HAVE I MADE A DIFFERENCE,

HELPED ANYONE,

TOLD THEM THAT EVERYTHING

WILL BE OKAY,

THAT THEY ARE LOVED?

HAVE I SHARED MY STORY

ABOUT HOW I WAS BEATEN DOWN?

HAVE I GIVEN THEM HOPE

THAT THINGS WILL TURN AROUND

IF THEY JUST HANG IN THERE

AND TAKE THINGS DAY TO DAY,

JUST ONE SECOND AT A TIME?

I KNOW THAT THINGS ARE HARD

AROUND THIS TIME OF YEAR.

EVERYONE WANTS TO CELEBRATE

AND SEEMS OF GOOD CHEER.

BUT YOU MAY BE ALONE,

NO HELP IN SIGHT,

NO ONE TO CELEBRATE WITH,

NO LIGHT.

BUT I AM HERE,

AND SO IS THE LORD.

I'VE BEEN THROUGH THE LONELINESS

AND PITIED MYSELF.

TODAY, THOUGH, I CAN STAND HERE

AND TELL YOU FOR SURE

THAT THINGS NEVER STAY THE SAME.

BE OF GOOD CHEER,

BE HAPPY IN YOUR HEART,

BE YOU,

AND NEVER DEPART

FROM THE LORD'S SIDE.

STAY IN HIS PRESENCE,

STAY ON THIS SIDE OF THE FENCE

THE TIDES WILL TURN IN YOUR FAVOR

EVEN IF IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE.

ONE DAY I WAS ALONE,

THE NEXT I WAS MARRIED.

EVEN AT THE AGE OF SIXTY

(WELL, ALMOST)

I CAN BE OF GOOD CHEER

BECAUSE I KNOW

DOWN IN MY SOUL

THAT I MAY NOT BE GOOD ENOUGH

FOR MY FAMILY

BUT THEY DON'T COUNT

BECAUSE GOD LOVES ME

AND I'M GOOD ENOUGH

FOR HIM.

JUST BELIEVE

BE YOU.

DON'T LISTEN TO THEM.

SHUT OUT THE GOSSIP.

TUNE IT OUT.

IT'S NOT GOOD FOR YOU.

YOU NEED THE TRUTH.

AND THE ONLY TRUTH 

YOU SHALL EVER FIND

IS NOT OUTSIDE,

BUT WITHIN.

CHECK YOUR HEART,

READ THE WORD.

DON'T GET YOUR

SELF-WORTH

FROM THIS DYING WORLD.

LISTEN TO THAT STILL QUIET VOICE

TO GET WHAT YOU NEED.

AND JUST

BELIEVE.

JUST ME

HERE I STAND BEFORE YOU LORD,

JUST ME.

NOTHING FANCY OR SPECIAL,

IT'S JUST ME.

I'VE BEEN CALLED MANY UNKIND NAMES,

LIKE STUPID AND UGLY.

BUT I KNOW IN YOUR EYES

I'M NOT THE SAME.

YOU CALL ME BEAUTIFUL,

THE APPLE OF YOUR EYE,

SPECIAL,

NOT ONE TO DESPISE.

YOU ARE MY FATHER,

AND I SHALL BE YOUR DAUGHTER.

IT'S JUST ME,

STANDING BEFORE YOU,

HUMBLY.

IN YOUR EYES

I AM HAPPY

TO BE

JUST ME.

DO YOU BELIEVE? (RVD)

THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT BELIEVE IN HEAVEN,

AND PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE IN HELL.

SOME OF THESE

DON'T EVEN BELIEVE

IN OUR CREATOR,

JEHOVAH JIREH,
OUR PROVIDER.

HOW CAN YOU

BELIEVE A PLACE EXISTS

IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN THE MAKER?

I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS.

YES, THERE IS A HELL.
BUT GOD DIDN'T MAKE IT FOR US,
HE MADE FOR THE FALLEN ANGELS.
DID THAT CLEAR THAT UP?

SIMPLY PUT IT'S A TOTAL COMPLETE

UNSTOPPABLE SEPARATION FROM GOD.

HELLFIRE AND BRIMSTONE?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHO DOES FOR SURE,

UNLESS YOU'VE BEEN THERE.

BUT GOD, BEING SUCH A LOVING GOD,

DOES NOT WISH TO SEND ANYONE THERE.

HE GIVES US SO MANY CHANCES,

BUT IF YOU RESIST CONSISTENTLY,

THEN WHAT IS HE TO DO?

I THANK HIM

FOR NOT GIVING UP ON ME,

FOR THERE WERE SO MANY TIMES

THAT I WALKED AWAY FROM HIM.

BUT I CAME BACK

BECAUSE I KNEW

HE WAS THE ONLY ONE

GOD

WHO IS

LIVING,

ALIVE,

AND TRUE.

Other Gods

Have I been making a mistake

by focusing so much on my daughter?

Has our lack of relationship

come between me and my Father?

Yes, I want her back in my life

more than ever.

I cry myself to sleep every night

just wishing for any sign from my baby

I need some relief.

But has my prayer life suffered?

Have I left God's side?

Do I need to be forgiven

for forsaking my relationship with my

Maker?

Have I made a God out of my daughter?

Am I the one to blame?

Am I a bad mother?

After all, she's not really mine.

She's only a gift, to be treasured for a 

time.

And is that time over?

Twenty years I had with her, closer than 

sisters

We did everything together, forged

together like twins.

Maybe I did too much, maybe I did too

little.

But in my mind I was trying to make up

for the all the many ways I was abused 

and neglected.

Maybe I went too far the other way.

But last night I had a revelation.

She's never once visited me in the 

hospital

when I was so sick and I didn't think I'd

pull through.

I was there for nearly half the year.

And now with this new ordeal, maybe 

I'm just laying too much on her little

shoulders when I should be laying 

everything on God's wide 

shoulders because His compassion, 

understanding and ability to handle is 

like no other.

I promise myself today, although I don't 

know how long it will last

that the first one I will go to with my

problems will be my Heavenly Father

rather than my daughter

He cares more, there is no doubt, only 

because He has the ability to carry the 

world on His shoulders.

2 Kings 17:35

When the Lord made a covenant with the Israelites, he commanded them: “Do not worship any other gods or bow down to them, serve them, or sacrifice to them.