LOVE, LOVE, LOVE

I CAN'T CHANGE HIM,
AND I CAN'T CHANGE HER,
AND I CERTAINLY CAN'T CHANGE THEM.
I CAN'T CHANGE WHAT THEY THINK OF ME.
IT'S FUTILITY.
I CAN ONLY CHANGE ME,
ACCORDING TO GOD'S
BASIC INSTRUCTIONS BEFORE LEAVING EARTH.
BEAM ME UP, JESUS.
AND I MUST SPEAK OUT FOR MYSELF,
NOT BE AFRAID TO SPEAK THE TRUTH -
GOD'S WRITTEN WORD,
WRITTEN ON MY HEART,
AND AS I HAVE SAID BEFORE,
ADDRESS NORMALLY NOT INCLUDED.
GOOGLE IT.
I TRY VERY HARD TO SPREAD JESUS' LOVE,
TO EVERYONE,
EXCEPT MAYBE TO MYSELF,
THANKS TO ALL OF THIS SHADRACK, MESCHACH
AND ABEDNEGO SEEMINGLY UNENDING ABUSE.
SO I TRY, TRY, TRY 
TO KEEP MY EYES HIGH, HIGH, HIGH
UPON THE PRIZE,
UPON MY SWEET JESUS,
STANDING THERE WAITING
O, SO PATIENTLY
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
CAN'T YOU SEE?
AND DESPITE THE BIG WOOD SPLINTER IN MY EYE,
HIS ARMS ARE OPENED WIDE,
AND HE'S SMILING,
AND AS HE LOOKS INTO MY EYES,
I SEE THE REFLECTION OF ME
AND FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE,
I FEEL UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, LOVE, LOVE.


PSALM 17:8  KEEP ME AS THE APPLE OF YOUR EYE; HIDE ME IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WINGS.

 

 

 

MISERY LOVES COMPANY

MISERY LOVES COMPANY.
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.
AND IT'S VERY TRUE.
WHEN' YOU'VE BEEN TREATED
LIKE YOU'RE SOMETHING ICKY
STUCK TO SOMEONE'S EXPENSIVE SHOE,
SOMEONE WHO THINKS THEY'RE BETTER THAN YOU
'CUZ THEY LIVE IN A NICE HOUSE
AND DRIVE A NICE CAR
AND WHERE NICE CLOTHES
AND YOU LIVE IN AN APARTMENT
AND CAN BARELY AFFORD THE GAS IT TAKES
TO GET TO YOUR NEW JOB,
PRAISE GOD,
MISERY LOVES COMPANY.
SO WHO DO YOU TURN TO
WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU?
WHEN YOU FEEL SO DOWN
THAT YOU CAN HARDLY SEE THE SUN PEAKING THROUGH,
WHAT ARE YOU TO DO?
WELL, FOR ME, IT'S TESTIFYING ABOUT MY
COMPLETELY MESSED UP LIFE,
TALKING UNASHAMEDLY ABOUT JESUS
TO THOSE BEAUTIFUL HEARTS OF THE
LESS UNFORTUNATE
AND SEEING A LIGHT SHINE IN THEIR EYES
WHEN YOU TELL THEM ABOUT JESUS' SACRIFICE
FOR UNFORTUNATE THEM.
LOOKING INTO THEIR DESIRING-TO-BE-LOVED
TEAR-FILLED EYES,
NOT THINKING THEY ARE GOOD ENOUGH
FOR BEING WASHED CLEAN BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS,
THAT BEAUTIFUL SACRIFICE.
SITTING BACK HERE IN MY WARM BED TODAY,
MY LITTLE ELVIS GIVING ME A THOUSAND KISSES,
I PRAY TO GOD THAT SOMEONE IN CHARGE
TAKES A LOOK AT THE SYSTEM
AND HAS THEIR EYES OPENED
AND SEE THAT IT'S INHUMANE
TO TREAT MISERY WITH MISERY.



PROVERBS 29:7 - THE RIGHTEOUS CARE ABOUT JUSTICE FOR THE POOR, BUT THE WICKED HAVE NO SUCH CONCERN.

PROVERBS 30:8 - ...GIVE ME NEITHER POVERTY NOR RICCHES, BUT GIVE ME ONLY MY DAILY BREAD. 

HAPPY

YOU MAY ASK ME
WHY I AM SO HAPPY TODAY
AFTER WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY,
AND THIS IS FROM MY HEART, MY SOUL
WHAT I HAVE TO SAY:
I HAVE JESUS IN MY HEART,
ASKED HIM IN WHEN I WAS FIVE.
LIVING IN A FAMILY WITH SO MUCH STRIFE.
SCREAMING AND HITTING AND
KILLING MY SOUL,
I'M NOT EXAGGERATING
WHEN I SAY THIS HAS BEEN MY LIFE
SINCE I WAS FIVE.
AND THAT'S WHEN I WAS SAVED.
I REMEMBER VERY VIVIDLY
THE SUNNY ARIZONA SUNDAY.
THE PASTOR CALLED
FOR AN ALTER CALL.
AND EVEN THOUGH
I WASN'T ALLOWED TO GO FORWARD,
JESUS KNEELED RIGHT DOWN
BY MY LITTLE SIDE
AND GENTLY PUT HIS HAND ON MY HEAD,
AND HE LOVINGLY CAME INTO
MY LITTLE BROKEN HEART.
AND EVEN THOUGH
I HAVE LEFT HIS SIDE
MORE TIMES THAN I WISH TO COUNT
(I CALL MYSELF
THE WOMAN AT THE WELL.)
JESUS HAS NEVER IN THESE MANY YEARS,
MORE THAN I WISH TO COUNT,
LEFT MY SIDE,
LEFT MY LIFE.
SO, YES,
TODAY,
THIS MOTHERS DAY,
I AM JOYFUL,
I AM AT PEACE,
I HAVE A SMILE ON MY FACE,
AND I AM HAPPY.


ROMANS 12:12-13 - BE JOYFUL IN HOPE, PATIENT IN AFFLICTION, FAITHFUL IN PRAYER. SHARE WITH THE LORD'S PEOPLE WHO ARE IN NEED.

PICK A SIDE

WHAT'S THE THING
THAT DRAWS YOUR ATTENTION
FIRST THING IN THE MORNING?
IS IT GOD OR MAN?
PLEASE GET OFF THE FENCE
AND PICK A SIDE.
IF YOU WANT TO BE HIS LIGHT,
THEN PLEASE PICK A SIDE.
FIRST YOU'RE WARM,
THEN YOU'RE COLD.
PLEASE GET OFF THE FENCE
AND PICK A SIDE.
YOU WANT TO BE A TESTIMONY?
THEN TURN OFF YOUR TV
AND OPEN YOUR BIBLE FOR A CHANGE,
DUST IT OFF.
PLEASE GET OFF THE FENCE
AND PICK A SIDE.
PLANT A SEED,
TOUCH A HEART,
REACH OUT A LOVING HAND.
PLEASE GET OFF THE FENCE
AND PICK A SIDE.
MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
BE A TESTIMONY.
LIGHT YOUR LIGHT.
PLEASE DO YOURSELF A FAVOR
AND GET OFF THE FENCE
AND PICK A SIDE.

PROVERBS 29:7 - THE RIGHTEOUS CARE ABOUT JUSTICE FOR THE POOR, BUT THE WICKED HAVE NO SUCH CONCERN.

IT'S A FREE COUNTRY

NOPE.
NO WAY, NO HOW.
NOT IN THE INNER CIRCLE.
NEVER HAVE BEEN.
IN FACT, I SINCERELY DOUBT
THAT MY PASTOR EVEN KNOWS MY NAME
OR THE SHAMEFUL THINGS THAT ARE HAPPENING
IN HIS OWN CHURCH, IN HIS OWN DOMAIN
THE DISCREPCT, THE JUDGING AND HYPOCRACY.
NO, I'M NOT GOING CRAZY.
I KNOW IT'S NOT JUST ME.
AND THOSE OF US WHO ARE TORN,
HURTING SO MUCH INSIDE,
FEELING AS IF WE DO NOT BELONG,
ARE MADE TO FEEL WORSE
BECAUSE WE ARE NOT WEARING THE RIGHT DRESS OR THE RIGHT SHOES.
THIS HARLET HEART IS CRUSHED,
IN DESPAIR,
WONDERING WHERE I WILL EVER GET THE STRENGTH TO CONTINUE.
WHY ME, MY SWEET JESUS?
YOU KNOW HOW VERY WEAK I AM.
JUST ASK MY FAMILY.
AND I'M OLD.
AND I'M TIRED.
AND I'M IN PAIN.
AND I AM SO TIRED OF GETTING MY HAND BIT.
HOW MANY TIMES MUST I REACH OUT,
TRY TO BUILD BRIDGES,
PLANT SEEDS?
HAVE I NOT DONE ENOUGH
FOR YOUR KINGDOM.
I FEEL SOME TIMES AS IF I HAVE GIVEN EVERYTHING.
SO, WHAT, LORD, SHALL I CONTINUE TO SPEAK MY MIND?
SHALL I NOT BE ASHAMED THAT YOU GIVE ME VISIONS AND DREAMS?
SHALL I NOT BE ASHAMED THAT I SPEAK THE ANGELIC LANGUAGE?
SHALL I NEVER BE ASHAMED TO SAY YOUR NAME?
SO, GO AHEAD,
CUT ME OUT OF THE 'INNER CIRCLE'.
YOU SHALL NEVER STOP ME FROM TELLING MY STORY.

PHILLIPIANS 4:7

AND THE PEACE OF GOD, WHICH TRANSCENDS ALL UNDERSTANDING, WILL GUARD YOUR HEARTS AND YOUR MINDS IN CHRIST JESUS.

HE IS ALWAYS NEAR

I glance up in the beautiful
puffy white-clouded blue sky
through the side window in our van
on our way to yet another doctor's visit.
Being outside for me is like taking a mini vacation.
Just in case you have not read or seen
any of my other little personal missives,
most of my days are spent lying in my comfy bed,
my cherished Dachshund Elvis snuggled under his binky,
my cat Panda, who knows how beautiful she is,
perched on top of the stacks of pillows
practically lying on my head.
I try what I can
to keep the pain at bay,
but unfortunately
my God made me in such a way
that the pain I feel just wants to stay.
And sometimes when I am lying here in my room,
a thought comes to mind, and I try to painfully pull 
the right words out of my head,
praying that I am glorifying Jesus whatever I say
and maybe helping someone in this bleak world
with these simple words.
Please know that Jesus is the same
yesterday, today and tomorrow.
It is we who change.
He still performs miracles
as he did on my back.
One night I felt a warm hand inside my spine
and the next day
I threw my crutches and bulky leg brace away.
Never give up, never give in.
Never fear
for He is always near.

PSALM 19:14

MAY THESE WORDS OF MY MOUTH AND THIS MEDITATION OF MY HEAR BE PLEASING IN YOUR SIGHT, LORD, MY ROCK AND MY REDEEMER.

Did I?

The wind sings a melody, whistling through the leaves.
The son lights my way in this play.
The air smells so sweet
I just want to dip my feet
in that bubbling creek
making its way
through Paradise.
Did I make it?
Am I home?
Is my heartache and pain done?
Did I stay on the right path?
Did I plant seeds along the way?
Did I glorify you, my sweet Jesus?
Did I help the helpless,
give hope to the hopeless,
love the unlovable
and forgive the unforgivable?
I know I strayed a time or two or three.
But, my sweet Jesus, are you proud of me?

PSALM 19:14

MAY THESE WORDS OF MY MOUTH AND THIS MEDITATION OF MY HEART BE PLEASING IN YOUR SIGHT, LORD, MY ROCK AND MY REDEEMER.