SINNER

Father, how can you even stand
to look at me
let alone love me like you do?
I'm the worst of the worst,
the sinner's sinner.
All of these secrets
in the deepest, darkest, smelliest
(excuse me for being truthful)
corners of my heart
that no one else but you knows about.
Yet you still want me to be part of your family.
You desire to prosper and not harm me,
to graft me into your tree
when my earthly family has rejected me
and hurt me beyond measure
for no other reason than I was born healthy,
at least that's what I've come to believe
I don't think I can take it again,
I mean, the loss of a friend
because,
as I'm sure you've noticed,
apparently I have too much drama in my life
for anyone to want to be or stay around,
unless they have an ulterior motive,
which is usually the case.
The pain is just too much.
My heart hurts.
I swear
this broken into pieces heart
cannot bear
more rejection.
Jesus, I'm begging you on bended knees (metaphorically)
to forgive me of my oh so many unforgivable sins
and never leave or forsake me
and always love me,
for, even such a sinner as me,
will never forget what you did for me on that tree.
Never.

JEREMIAH 29:11

FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU," DECLARES THE LORD,

"PLANS TO PROSPER YOU AND NOT TO HARM YOU, PLANS TO GIVE YOU

HOPE AND A FUTURE