It's a given (UPDATED WITH SCRIPTURE)

Back here in my bedroom,

feeling sorry for myself,
lonely, alone and blue,

as if the whole world is passing me by.
Allowing myself,
in pity
to give in to the random thoughts
running, screaming through my head,
hauntingly
beating me bloody, pulpy,

till the cows come home,
as we say in the south;
unceasingly telling me that I will soon be dead.

Morose, I know, but that's how it is

when  you're in constant pain,
chronic pain,

dealing with it every single arduous day,

every minute,
ever second the same.
Not exaggerating.

Will things ever change?

If my life now is to be given a chance, 

I need to chase these blues away,

and I know the only way to do so is to turn to what I truly believe.

I know God has chosen me,

I know He has a plan,

I know He hasn't given up on me yet
as others have,

as I have.

But my life is not yet over,

I'm still here, 
albeit a ghost,

and I know I need to change these thoughts

if I am to make the most

out of what I have been given,
what I have been told
and shown,

what God has given me.

These struggles that I deal with daily are just a shadow

of eternity.

So if the evil one wants to mess with my mind,
too bad,

he can stop right now,

because I have not yet finished my job, this race

that  my sweet Jesus has allowed.

If one word of what I am writing

can touch just one lonely soul

then I can rest my head on my pillow
in peace,
 and know that I am doing a good work

despite everything I have to battle.

I refuse to give in,

I refuse to let anyone else but my sweet Jesus win.

And I have read the end of the book,

I've cheated a little bit, as I am want to do,
so

I know that in the end

it's a given.
WE WIN!

1 John 3:11 - For this is the message you heard from the beginning: we should love one another.

Psalm 1:1-3 - Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord and who meditates on his law day and night,  That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither - whatever they do prospers.